Colin's Four Step Plan for a Semi - Successful Amateur Night

Did you ever notice how only amateurs refer to New Years Eve as "amateur night" ? Well, it's true. Anyway, that being said, there is still a whole bunch of pressure to have the greatest night of your life on New Year's Eve. Especially for you younger folks in your 20's. More often than not, after all the build up, the night ends up a failure with tearful fights, heartache and possible run in with the law.

Having lived through many New Year's Eve, both successful and the opposite, here is my very quick guide to making it a satisfying evening. Or at least not a total disaster.

1) Get your expectations in line. The chances of this being the greatest night of your life are extremely small. In fact, take the number 1 and put it next to the days you have been alive and those are your odds. My odds would be 16,060 to 1. That isn't the horse you want to bet on. Why not just try to make it the best night of the week? That pays 7 to 1. That is a goal within your grasp.

2) Logistics. Get what you need, get where you are going and do not drive again. Best option is to get dropped off where you are going. You will figure out a way home. Only an ASS drives on New Year's Eve. And don't stop at White Castle no matter how tasty it sounds at 3 am.

3) Surround yourself with people you really like. It just takes one asshole to ruin the whole night with a bad decision. Only your tightest crew should be assembled as your core group. 

4) Do not chase the party, let it come to you. Once you are with good people and have what you need, hunker down to a reasonably good spot and spread the word. Don't hit the panic button and start jumping from spot to spot. The grass most likely isn't greener and you end up running all over hell's half acre only to find each party is lamer than the last one. Frustration and bad vibes are certain to follow ruining the evening. OR... put another way, if you are hunting deer, you don't run around the forest shooting a gun in the air, you hunker down and they will come to you.

Follow these four rules I can guarantee that your New Year's Eve will turnout pretty damn good. At the very least it should keep you out of the pokey. Merry New Year!

Colin Gawel once watched Watershed back their van into the side of Dash Rip Rock's Van on New Year's Eve in Memphis. He was shouting "NO!" to Biggie, but Biggie thought he was shouting "GO!". Dash's van was totaled. Being Dash, they thought it was funny.