Big $ Checks in from Indianapolis before Browns v Colts
The Browns are road favorites for the first time since 2014. To mark the occasion, Big $ took the North Coast Posse Gremlin West on I-70 to watch the game at a bar close to Lucas Oil Field. The following report was filed on his cellphone from The Whistle Stop Inn two hours before kick off.
The Browns enter a stretch of four games that look to be competitive. What has to go right to beat the Colts this weekend?
Big $ - "Competitive" is such a relative word in Browns land. If they play with the mental acumen of a codeine laced juggalo as they did this past week, they would not win the MAC east. It does not take much to deflate the sheerest glimpses of optimism that we are afforded as Browns fans and the Ravens game left plenty of holes for air to escape, The only factor that I think would lead to a victory this Sunday is if the Colts commit more significant mistakes.
Corey Coleman is injured again and the ghost of T Pryor is looming larger by the minute. Has anybody figured out we paid Kenny Britt instead of TP?
Big $ - I have not combed through Kenny Quit's advanced stats, but I am assuming that he must have some Joey Votto like sabre metrics going on to have pulled the wool over the money ball boys' eyes the way he did. When you have grand canyon sized space in your salary cap, you don't let the only playmaker on your offense walk, no matter how big of an S.O.B. Drew Rosenhaus is.
Kizer left the game with a headache. Is this troubling?
Big $ I know that playing the role of "Mr. Football Guy" in today's P.C. world is very unpopular, but I am quite wary of a Rookie with much to prove taking a few quarters off for a migraine. I'm no doctor, but if a headache is severe enough to excuse yourself, MID GAME, from your $800,000 a year job quarterbacking the Browns offense, you should probably spend the rest of the day in a dark room. I think there is room for concern in this case.
OK, it's time, who should Lebron start for this week?
Big $ - Literally, I do not know if there is one current starter at any position on the Browns who i am confident would be better than Lebron
What are you eating right now?
Big $ - These breakfast nachos are pretty awesome though the syrup mixed with salsa takes some getting used too. I slipped in a couple Hilltop Lagers just to save some cash for the ride homw.