Matt Carlson is a singer/songwriter/guitarist based in Lansing, Michigan. When he’s not making music with The Stick Arounds or Harborcoat, he’s probably live-streaming some recently-finished songs, fishing a mid-Michigan lake, or enjoying a good whiskey on his back porch. These words caught the eye of Pencil Storm ed. Jeremy Porter who offered to share it with our readers as a poignant perspective of the damage the pandemic is doing to the psyche of working musicians.

If things had gone according to plan, we would be on the road right now. Five of us crammed in a van with amps, gear, cold brew, and a box of cassette tapes. It's been nearly six months since the last time we played a show together. The world keeps turning and there are more important things afoot for sure.

I'm lucky. Our family has maintained employment. There is food on the table and the lights are on. But I would be lying if I said that there is not a hole in my life. Playing shows and making records with some of the most important people in my life has been a concrete and productive way for me to be reminded of my worth and my abilities. Driving on a blank Midwestern highway towards the excitement of a show and a new town is still thrilling in some small way. We don't pretend to be rock stars but we know we've earned the right to drive that road.

I miss the camaraderie of meeting and befriending other bands. While my bank account might love the break, I miss the happy hour cocktails at a dark whiskey bar in Dayton or the dusty shelves of a Milwaukee record shop. I miss laughing for four days straight and shutting out the world while we come together to make something bigger than ourselves, to build something humble and a little bit beautiful. I miss being in a band.

During Covid we have managed to practice a few times. We have maintained our friendships and seen each other at safe distances. We have even been recording what feels like our best work ever. Somehow though, it lacks the same level of verve, energy and enthusiasm of building these things together in a room and walking the high wire of playing a new thing in front of strangers and hoping they feed off of it.

We are healthy, for now, and we are safe. We have not faded away from each other and we have not given up. But we're home tonight and I wish we were driving that road together to a place full of strangers, beer, load-in, drive thru meals and fitful sleep in cheap hotel rooms. Hell, I almost miss the shitty coffee at the continental breakfast.

Check out The Stick Arounds and Harborcoat and the other great bands at GTG Records!

Jeremy Porter lives near Detroit and fronts the rock and roll band Jeremy Porter And The Tucos. Follow them on Facebook to read his road blog about their adventures on the dive-bar circuit.
www.thetucos.com
www.facebook.com/jeremyportermusic
www.rockandrollrestrooms.com
Twitter: @jeremyportermi | Instagram: @onetogive & @jeremyportermusic