Cavs n Roses: "The Greatest NBA Players Get Embarrassed." - by Ben Galli

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The greatest players get embarrassed. Magic Johnson fell flat on his face running onto to the court in his first game ever.  Larry Bird wore the stupidest mustache for the better part of his career.  Jordan was going bald when he took Kareem’s advice and just shaved it all off.  I contend that’s what made him better than Clyde Drexler.  


Anthony Davis got swept by the Golden State Warriors last night.  He also has a land bridge over his eyes.  We’ll get to that later.  This was Davis’ first playoff series in the year he blossomed into what many felt he was destined to be.  The Brow averaged 24.4 points per game (4th in NBA), 10.2 rebounds per game (8th), and 2.9 blocks per game (1st) this year. In the playoffs those numbers rose to 31.5, 11.0, and 3.0.  But he couldn’t win a game.  Obviously the Pelicans were playing a far superior Warriors team that had won 22 more regular season games.  Davis showed that he could play big in the bigger games.  The question now remains: What will he do next?  Will he take his team to the next level?  Great players make those around them greater.  Bird and Magic did it with their passing and attitude.  Jordan punched his way to the top.  Who knows if Steve Kerr would be a good coach if he hadn’t experienced the Jordan rules.  He himself says it was one of the best things that ever happened to him.  Davis is pretty much unstoppable but will he put in the work to take his team to newer heights.  I believe in his desire for greatness.  But how high can Pelicans fly anyway?

Still, Davis may have bigger problems.  Many around me believe his grooming can be improved.  Or is it an issue of grooming?  Face it.  We can’t depend on the judicial branch of this great nation to decide on the most important issues of the day.  Sometimes the people have to take to the streets.  Or the tweets.  So I ask you loyal readers: Should Anthony Davis get rid of his famed unibrow or should he continue owning it and keep it? I hope there’s more of you than the Supreme Court, and I hope you’re all less old.  

The A-K Rowdy is being represented well in these playoffs.  Although Akron can’t truly claim Stephen Curry, he joins LeBron James as top 5 NBA players this year that were born in that famed city.  I imagine if you’re reading this column, you saw his absolutely not-real, eyes-closed, fouled, 3-point dagger to tie the game Thursday night.  If I knew how to Vine, I’d Vine it for you but the anticipation of searching for it online will only increase the satisfaction.  (watch it here)  In just under 40 minutes a game, Steph put up 33.8 points per contest in the 4-game sweep of New Orleans.  That’s Curry in a Hurry.  LeBron James has been LeBron James but Kyrie Irving has really been impressive.  In his first playoff series ever, Irving has shown a cold confidence that the Cavs will need to truly contend in these playoffs.  Kevin Love is shooting 47.4 percent from 3-point land, a considerable improvement over his 36.7 regular season percentage.  The Celtics have battled hard and impressed many.  Just imagine this team with an actual superstar.  However, I don’t see them winning a game in this series.  It’s not like Rajon Rondo’s going to suit up for them and not play.  

Someone who’s always played and brought it in the big games?  One 39 year old Timothy Theodore Duncan.  I’ve actually heard people spew vitriol towards him simply for how bland and boring he is.  In my mind though, 5 rings is never bland and boring.  And come on, the guy’s official website is  Exciting stuff.  Duncan scored 28 on 14 of 23 shooting in Wednesday’s important game 2, then took it easy with 4 points in the Spurs 100-73 blowout win Friday night.  Yes, the Spurs won the important game 3 in the best series of the first round by far.  This could have been the Western Conference Finals.  The game Sunday is a must win for the Clippers.  They have the 3:30 pm national attention.  They’re on the road at a place they were recently embarrassed.  Chris Paul might murder most of his teammates if they lose.  Blake Griffin does not want to be remembered for that dribble off his foot or as just Taylor Griffin’s little brother.  

But really, most of the series' have been atypically one-sided this year.  The Wizards are up 3-0 on the Toronto Drakes, despite Randy Wittman’s buffoonery.  (Just look up Randy Wittman Playboard.)  The Rockets lead the Mavs 3-0 and somehow Josh Smith is making them a lot better.  Both these teams can sweep today.  Why even play another game?  The Nets and Bucks both won yesterday.  I don’t want to waste words on the Brooklanta series, but the Bucks called a great play at the end to steal their victory.  I just wonder who called it, Jason Kidd or one of his assistants.  It was nice for the Deer to get a playoff win, but the Bulls should close out tomorrow.  The Jimmy Butler, D-Rose backcourt is going to spell trouble for all and the 2nd round Bulls-Cavs matchup will determine your East Coast Champ.  Memphis is pretty much dominating the overmatched Blazers.  R.I.P. City is down 3-0 but the larger concern might be are they losing LaMarcus Aldridge in free agency this summer.  Is he going back to Texas or is L.A. in LA’s future?  

It’ll be about a week but the 2nd round will show more promise.  Nothing in the East can top Cavs-Bulls, so as per usual the excitement level will come up short there.  Atlanta will lose whatever respect they may have gained this year if they can’t beat the Bullets.  In the West, although it’s too early to count the Clips out, the 2nd round in my mind will be Spurs-Rockets and Warriors-Grizz.  If Josh Smith stays in control and uses his talents, the Rockets can make it interesting.  The gritty Grizzlies may have just enough moxie and Marc Gasol to take G-State to the limit.  Still though, it feels like Spurs-Warriors is inevitable.  Well, until next time, a throwback to last year’s playoffs. @bengalli33